Ms160 goes fishing again....

A few years ago I posted about a CBT scene where we used diving and fishing weights:

"Sol stood before me, naked but for a short sleeveless T shirt, cuffed and collared, hands behind his back, eyes lowered, chest and pubic area freshly shaved. "Time" I said, "to go fishing"...

"I handed sol his black leather parachute ball stretcher, and while he put it on, I uncovered a tray of new "pervertables" acquired at diving and fishing stores a couple of weekends ago in Sydney. I selected fishing sinkers first - these were in various shapes, sizes and weights. Most were teardrop shaped, some were round. All were solid metal.

"I had requested sol make wires of various lengths, plus small hooks out of a wire coat hanger, which were connected to the sinkers in a manner that each could be added or detracted individually, or together as a group. However, as this was our first scene with these new toys, I needed to establish their limits...

"First I added several teardrop shaped sinkers to the bottom of the parachute, then the round balls ... by the time I had added the amount of weights you can see in these photos, I definitely had sol's complete attention

He was leaning forward, hands on knees. When I requested he move a little to the left for the photo, he moved far too quickly and the weights swung to the side and sol groaned - he said later it felt like "your balls are being ripped out of your body. One at a time". Having anticipated this, I laughed.

I played with various sinkers for about 15 minutes, admiring the pretty effect of their differing shapes and length of attachment wires, something I had thought would look aesthetically pleasing.

After a while I carefully began removing them - it was time to try our other new "pervertable": diving weights...

As these had no holes for attachments, I had instructed sol earlier to wrap them in "bondage" cord. Now I picked up the first two (one and two pounds in weight) and threaded sol's wire hooks through the top of the cord, then attached the hooks to the parachute ... the result was a great deal of amusement for me, and more knee bending and yowling for sol...."

So you get the idea. Basically we had a lot of fun. Since then I've carried those weights around in my "Mistress bag" (a leather pilot's case). They weighed a fucking ton (excuse my French) but they were the kind of "pervertables" you always wanted "just in case". Anyway, as a good slave sol always carries the case so it's weight isn't my problem *grin*

Last weekend (in part at the request of some regular readers) it was again "time to go fishing....".

I laid out everything I planned to use:


Looks good, doesn't it?

Advice for new dominants reading this: always assemble all your gear nearby. Saves heaps of running around mid scene and possible screwing the mood ("oi! snap of out of subspace ... I need to ask where you put the [insert item you forgot]")

I had sol put on this leather ball stretcher for the first part of the scene:


And then strung him up, cuffed hands above head, to an attachment point that drops from our ceiling. The first toy I decided to use was a new item from S(A)X: black Japanese clover clamps:


Regular readers might recall our last pair rusted over after we took them camping on Moreton Island with other kinksters. We'd been desperate for a new pair for a while, so thank you to S(A)X :)

They were fun to clip onto sol's balls for a while. I then removed them - gently of course ... well, sort of ... and attached a diving weight to sol's ball stretcher:


Note those knees, folks. They are not bending much .... yet. So I added another diving weight. Look at that wonderfully stretched skin:


While sol processed the weights I added another layer of sensation: this amazing 5 headed Wartenberg Wheel:


S(A)X says of this product:

"the 5 Pinwheel has five individually rotating wheels each with 19 pins, that's 133 stimulating needles!"

As I wrote later on Fetlife "and they all fit on the head of a cock!". Yay!

Look at these exquisite drops of blood:


Sol said the prickings on the head of his cock were like electric shocks.

After I'd indulged in some fun with this new toy (I can't recommend it highly enough, it's going to be a firm favorite from now on) it was time to get serious about the weights. So I started adding the long tear drop fishing sinkers of various lengths:


Remembering how much sol enjoyed a certain action with these ("When I requested he move a little to the left for the photo, he moved far too quickly and the weights swung to the side and sol groaned - he said later it felt like "your balls are being ripped out of your body. One at a time". Having anticipated this, I laughed." ) I swung the sinkers from side to side:


Yup. From the yowls above me, THAT still worked :)

Then it was time to add the heavier diving weights. Look at those knees bending now:


At this point sol called yellow and we stopped. He'd been in position about 20 minutes and his raised arms were getting pins and needles. I released him from the restraints and had him perch on the corner of a nearby desk, his arms and hands behind him.

I took the opportunity to have him remove the ball stretcher and put on the leather parachute:


I then started adding round fishing sinkers:


And then some of the longer tear drop shaped sinkers. I've asked sol several times what this felt like. He shakes his head and says:

"if you don't have testicles and have never had weights put on them, well, you just can't explain the sensation"

LOLOL. Finally I again added two of the diving weights:


Which were last to be removed:


Before sol could draw breath I got out the final toy for the scene: Dencorub.


We'd tried a scene where we Dencorub-ed his balls, and a scene where I had him masturbate with a mixture of Dencorub and lube. This time I wanted to try Dencorub on his cock head:


Sol found this quite effective, particularly in the puncture holes from the Wartenberg Wheel ... which of course was what I'd hoped for:


However, I'm sure some of you have noticed. Mistress160 The Wally doesn't have gloves on in those last photos. Nope. I was too busy having fun and watching sol's responses. Result: Dencorub all over my palm and fingers. *sigh".

I used them to good effect and wanked sol for a bit, but that was the end of that scene....

Seriously, thought, be careful with chemical play and using hot / cold products. It's such an easy thing to do, to get caught up in what you are doing and forget that these creams are very powerful directly on the skin.

Photos:
Ms160

High Protocol dramas...

(photo provenance unknown)

Regular readers might recall MzAntonina and myself are hosting a high protocol tea party in Sydney next week. I posted about it here. The Fetlife event page reads in part:

"A High Protocol Femdom Tea Party with a Victorian theme will be Hosted by Mistress160 (Head Mistress of ClubFEM - NSW) and MzAntonina at the House of Wafflé in Sydney on Saturday afternoon, 28 May.

"This ClubFEM - NSW event will commemorate and honor the memory of MsGawjusRedhead, an inaugural member of ClubFEM - NSW.

"Historically correct afternoon tea will be served to Female Dominant Guests by male servers. The afternoon will also include:

- Fiendish Games (including some MsGawjusRedhead was very fond of) and Punishments
- Readings of Victorian Pornography
- Lessons in Birching
- Art Lessons (Drawing Naked Subs)

Sol and I have been assembling the birch rods:


We plan to tie them up with something special (black velvet ribbons to commemorate MsGawjusRedhead's Black Sash events) and then give each guest some birch rods to take home:


The ones coming interstate will have fun packing them *grin*.

MzA is looking after the catering side of things, while I've focused more on the invites and drafting the protocol program, and working on other events for our guests to enjoy that Saturday. Quite a few of us hope to start the day with a visit to Gallery Serpentine, for last minute costume inspiration. Then after the tea party, in the evening, most of us are attending Uberplay May:

"uber opens its doors and invites you to a luxurious evening of decadent debauchery. where elegance, fetish and bdsm exist in a space far removed from the day-to-day.

"uberplay is exactly that. an event revolving around play. light play mingles with heavy play. from the spontaneous and impromptu, through to the more planned and deliberate of exhibitionist scenes, there is always something to see and hear. step through our door, and the night is all about you.

"from canapés served by attentive waiters, to dedicated bar staff waiting to pour your drinks, we are there to make your evening seemless. so you can relax, explore, and be the person that you really are.

"as a play party, it has no equal. we invite you inside…"

I think our guests will enjoy it :). And then, bed will be lovely thank you very much.

One thing that has been frustrating is the number of people who put themselves down as attending / possibly attending on the event page. You can upload your own event page on Fet, but you can't edit who puts themselves down as attending, which is a real hassle for invitation only events. The event page makes the invite process clear:

"This is a small, invitation only event at a private home and places are limited. Preference will be given to those who have attended and served at ClubFEM - NSW events, but everyone must contact the organizers to request a place. New servers (including the subs of Female Dominants Guests not known to the organizers) will be considered but are required to fill in a questionnaire to confirm suitability, and attend a High Protocol service training afternoon.

"If you are interested in attending - as either a Guest or server - or are interesting in attending or serving at future Femdom tea parties / ClubFEM - NSW events please drop ClubFEM - NSW Head Mistress160 or MzAntonina a private line"

We ended up having to add:

"PLEASE NOTE: We are getting quite a few people registering attendance / possible attendance without contacting the organizers. To repeat: we are very sorry but without contacting / confirming your invitation from MzAntonina and Mistress160 you will not be on the guest list"

It may sound trivial but as I responded to one young woman who had put herself down ("I am only down as a maybe for the ClubFEM tea party...that was more or less for my own calendar remindings on FL.") :

"with respect may I point out that for private events you seriously screw things up for both organizers and other guests treating event pages as a personal calendar.

"In this case, because of your connection with [a mutual friend], we could easily have catered for you. It also wrongly allows other guests to assume you are invited, and also part of the planning process (which in this case has been going on for three months .... so for example other guests have asked what you are wearing, and what protocols you use in your own D/s).

"Would you put yourself down for Uber, if you have not contacted Dee and requested a ticket? Of course not. Our event is the same"

We had one really weird post turn up on a thread in the ClubFEM - NSW group, from a couple neither MzA or I knew at all, but that other friends have confirmed are nice people, which made their post even stranger. It was written in response to someone posting about attending:

"@*** and any future comers:
If per chance your not in the 'click", lick arse or are a want to be - YOUR ARE NOT INVITED!!"

I wrote back:

"your message is hard to understand, but you certainly seem angry about something, so I'll try to respond.

"Assuming you mean ""clique" by "click", I can assure you there isn't one. Any Femdom oriented couple can join their local ClubFEM branch. You could attend events either with ClubFEM - NSW members or even with ClubFEM - ACT, which is not too far away and which has lots of terrific events happening at the moment.

"As for this specific event, attendance preference is being given to friends of MsGawjusRedhead, as the tea party is being organized for those friends to remember her. But this is a very popular event and there will be many new faces there, with guests and servers hoping to travel from the ACT, NSW, QLD, Tas, even New Zealand. You would both have been most welcome, if you'd contacted the organizers privately as requested above"

That last line is actually important for another reason I'd like to point out. That particular thread contains several posts from men wanting to attend the tea party. But here's the thing: if you want to serve at a high protocol Femdom event, then you put yourself into the zone and read any instructions you are given regarding that event very carefully. When organizers say:

"If you are interested in attending - as either a Guest or server - or are interesting in attending or serving at future Femdom tea parties / ClubFEM - NSW events please drop ClubFEM - NSW Head Mistress160 or MzAntonina a private line"

That means: a private line. It's a high protocol event, for God's sake. Let's be honest here - I don't have time to write to everyone on public threads who can't follow the first and only instruction they've so far received. It doesn't bode well for their following orders later.

Because it was a high protocol event we also insisted that in the case of couples wishing to attend, that we correspond - prior to issuing an invite to a new couple - with the female dominant partner. Boy, we had some men complain about THAT. But apart from the courtesy side of it, we NEED to get to know these women because the protocols that we created for the event are devised with their input.

And we've had so much fun with that side of it. And it's been interesting, working with other Dommes and finding out their own D/s rules and rituals. For example, while we've all agreed to leave speech and gaze restrictions as part of the servers' protocols, we all decided to ditch the commonly used "subs will speak in the third person" protocol because it universally drove everyone mad!

I think it's going to be a really great day. And I'm looking forward very much to seeing old friends again and meeting new ones.

I'll let you know how things go. Right now sol and I are driving to Sydney to spend a couple of nights with MzAntonina and MacTheKnife, so we'll be back online in a day or so....

Photos:
Ms160

SlutWalk in Sydney - update

For readers interested in Sydney's Slutwalk, audryautonomy just posted on Fet:

SlutWalk Sydney: Queen's Birthday Public Holiday Monday 13th June

DUE TO EXPECTED NUMBERS MASSIVELY OUTSTRIPPING ORIGINAL ESTIMATES WE HAVE HAD TO CHANGE OUR ROUTE

NEW ROUTE:

1:30pm meet outside Sydney Town Hall, George St, Sydney for a 2pm start
2:30pm speakers and performance outside the District Court
4pm arrive at Harmony Park, next to the Surry Hills Police Station

This Queen's Birthday Public Holiday:
Coinciding with, and supported by, Camp Betty 2011, the Sydney SlutWalk stands in solidarity with Toronto (and other cities internationally) against victim blaming and slut shaming.

No one should equate enjoying sex with attracting sexual assault. Being in charge of our sexual lives should not mean that we are opening ourselves to an expectation of violence, regardless if we participate in sex for pleasure or work. We are tired of being oppressed by slut-shaming; of being judged for our perceived sexuality and feeling unsafe as a result. Our cities, our streets and out parks belong to all of us. No one should associate the use of public space with fear of violence and rape.

Our message is that rape can never be ok and that sexual assault is inexcusable, regardless of mode of dress or perceived sexual orientation. “Slut” is being reappropriated from a form of hate speech to a valid expression of sexuality. SlutWalk Sydney invites you to support the event and join us in this call for an end to the disgraceful vilification of the survivors of assault and rape.

A myth about sex work is that it is a job that is high-risk for sexual assault. In reality this has the effect of impunity for sex workers' assailants. In NSW sex work is decriminalised and street sex work has been legal since 1979. Regardless of sex workers legal rights, those who report rape and assault are still regularly blamed and victimised by police, media and in court. This is a shameful and completely unacceptable situation and must be challenged. There are sex workers participating in all the Australian SlutWalks, marching in defence of their profession, their personal autonomy, and most importantly their basic human rights.

SlutWalk Sydney will coincide with, and is supported by a radical political festival taking place over the Queen’s Birthday long weekend. Camp Betty is a uniquely Australian, national convergence on issues of sex, gender and sexuality. The festival will host major panels on policing and the justice system; queer sexuality, radical action & electoral politics; sex worker activism; queer spaces; and consent.

Contact for media or to help out: slutwalksydney@gmail.com

Sydney SlutWalk community page:
http://www.facebook.com/pages/SlutWalk-Sydney-Sluts……

For details of SlutWalks in other Australian cities: http://www.facebook.com/pages/SlutWalk-Australia/21……

And Around the World:
http://www.slutwalktoronto.com/satellite

Camp Betty Sydney 2011:
www.campbetty.org

FetLife Event - http://fetlife.com/events/54041
Facebook Event - http://www.facebook.com/#!/event.php?eid=2047086695…

Safe Calls / Silent Alarms

Photo swiped from The Heron Clan

T of The Heron Clan puts up a "Safety Post" once a year or so. Her latest post begins:

"Yes, it has been about a year since my last "Safety Post". And many of you have heard my tale, but there are newbies lurking out there that need to be careful, too.

"About 14-ish years ago I thought I was invincible. I could play with strangers and nobody would cause me harm unless I asked for it. Boy, was I wrong!

"I "met" the "Dom of my Dreams" online. We chatted alot and of course we were practically "soul-mates"...because I was being stupid and believed all the lies. Finally we planned to meet. He came to town and got a motel room and I got all gussied up and blindly went off to meet my future MONSTER.

"He met me at the door with a gun..."

Safety is extremely important in the scene. To be honest although it's covered in topics like my Going Real Time Series (Moving into the Lifestyle) series, I don't talk about safety enough, either here or over on my BDSM For Beginners blog.

So I 200% recommend you head over to The Heron Clan to read the rest of T's post. T not only discusses what happened that night, she explains what's required regarding creating your own personal Safe Call / Silent Alarm system, for when you are meeting a stranger for play. And as T reminds us, while this is important for any "newbies lurking out there" its also important as a refresher for more experienced players. As T concludes:

"play safe. Take care of each other"

REFERENCES AND ONLINE RESOURCES:

T at The Heron Clan: "Safety First People!"

WANT TO LEARN MORE?

altsubmission - The Importance of a safety net
Domsub - Safe Call Refresher
elle finn - 10 Things I wish I'd known about
LunaKM - 5 Things to Give your safe Call Person
LunaKM - First Meetings Done Safely
LunaKM - Identifying Fake Dominants and Posers
Ms160 - Going Real Time Series (Moving into the Lifestyle)
Postat Safety First - Fun Second Safety When Meeting For The First Time
Powererotics BDSM Safety
screamer Online / offline BDSM Safety
Raven Shadowborne - Safe call and safe words
SirBamm! - Safe call guide and outline
Twist of Wyrd BDSM Safety - First Time Meetings
Wiki - BDSM - Safety

Thank you:
T and the Heron Clan, for reminding me
I need to post more on this topic

Photo:
Photo swiped from
The Heron Clan

The beauty of flesh hooks...

alexpierce during his solo pull

The first weekend in May sol and I attended the "Hook / Energy Pull Workshop" presented by our Melbourne based friend Bella447 and organized by Satet and alexpierce.

Flesh suspension and hook / energy pulls have long held my interest, both in and out of the scene. As a part of the art museum world I was fascinated by Stelarc, an Australian artist who has performed extensively in Japan, Europe and the USA. Stelarc utilized suspension in his performances during the 1970s and 1980s:

STELARC
No title (no. 7 sitting swaying event for rock suspension):
from photo documentation of "Suspension Events". (1976)
see full image accreditation at end of post

I was intrigued as a curator by how the artist “explore[d] the physical and psychological parameters of the body”, utilizing pain, technology and medical procedures within his art. Here are the his memories regarding the image above:

"Sitting / Swaying event for rock suspension (Tamura Gallery, Tokyo - 11 May, 1980). Encircled by 18 granite rocks, which counterbalanced its weight, the body was suspended in a sitting position. Each rock weighed between 3.5 - 4.2 kgms, one rock for each insertion point. The rocks were first suspended from eye-bolts in the ceiling, then connected to the body sitting on the floor. The rocks were then lowered, lifting the body into space. During the suspension time of approximately 17 minutes, the body swayed, gently swinging all the rocks in different direction"

Pain was an important component of what he was experiencing with the suspensions, and I found it very interesting to see how he constantly challenged his audience. Mark Fernandez writes of these performances:

"Stelarc was naked, his skin from shoulders to near his kneecaps, had hooks inserted with wires that ran through mounted pulleys that tugged and stretched his skin as he was raised up. A hook pulling the flesh is an action illustrating form-stimulus interacting with the body ... The hook acting as the stimulus penetrates skin and breaks the spatial dimensions that would normally constitute it as form..."

This next photo was taken in Canberra in 1982, near where we lived:

STELARC
Prepared Tree Suspension: Event for Obsolete
Body, No.6 (1982). Foothills of Black Mountain, Canberra.
Photograph taken by Norman Ainsworth.
see full image accreditation at end of post

These images still hold enormous power for me. In the 1980s and 90s (as I explored my own kinkiness) I wondered if there was a BDSM component to his work, but Stelarc makes his motivation clear in the quote below:

"Although the suspensions deal with the physical difficulty of the body strung up they have neither religious intent (transcending the body) nor the yearning for shamanistic empowering. They are realised with neither the intention of initiation rites nor the S&M exploration of pain and pleasure.

"What can be admitted though is that a painful experience does collapse the convenient distinction between the mind and body. ... To be suspended is to be between states. To be neither one nor the other. To be in suspense is neither being able to participate in the present nor to anticipate the outcome…"

Stelarc's comment about the suspensions having "neither religious intent (transcending the body) nor the yearning for shamanistic empowering" is also important. These rituals and ceremonies provided him a springboard in terms of technique, nothing more:

"when I first came across the notion of piercing the skin, I thought, if you could suspend the body using techniques like these, then you would have a minimum of support, you'd have just the insertion and single cable ... A lot of primal rituals have to do with suspending the body,but ... For me there was no religious context, no shamanistic yearnings, no yogic conditioning that had to do with these performances. In fact, they occurred in the same kind of stream of consciousness. In mean, I don't take any anaesthetics, I don't chant or get into altered states.."

Stelarc was to travel a long way beyond these early works (in part via the use of medical instruments, prosthetics, robotics, virtual reality systems and the Internet) in his exploration of alternate, intimate, and involuntary interfaces with the body.

Meanwhile, as a young cultural anthropologist I was traveling in the opposite direction, back to Stellarc's original cultural history sources, which allowed me to pursue my own research interests in ritual ordeals, in particular ceremonies like the Thaipusam Festival in Asia (which I saw for myself one year) and the North American Indian Sun Dance:

When researching these ceremonies and rituals I would find myself drawn to descriptions of how the piercings traditionally were undertaken. For example, this description from the Sun Dance:

"After an hour of dancing and singing around the cottonwood tree, a dancer lays down on his back. The medicine man cuts two slits in the skin of his chest above each nipple. He then pulls up the skin, opening the wounds wide enough to slip a peg through each pair of slits. He wraps a rawhide thong around the exposed ends of the pegs and ties on a single rope, much like the Y-shaped tow line of a water skier, the top of the Y tied to the tree.

"The dancer rises and resumes dancing and blowing on his whistle. He dances backwards until the rope is taut, his skin stretching against the tug of the rope. Other dancers encourage him in a fury of dancing, whooping and whistling. Finally, by leaning back, dancing and screeching on his whistle, he rips the pegs from his flesh. Soon another dancer takes his turn..."

Powerful stuff. I was on a different path (academia!) back then, but I certainly recognized the connections made by Raven Kaldera when I encountered his writings much later on my own BDSM journey:

"Primitive cultures have used physical and emotional and sexual ordeals in order to achieve altered states a lot more often than we modern westerners would like to admit. We can utilize some of their techniques, but their contexts are often opaque to us, as we weren't raised in their tribal culture. We need to create our own set of ordeal rituals that resound with our experiences and yet do not partake of the negative materialism in our society. Indeed, they should ideally be an antidote to it.

"We can see a beginning of this yearning for physical ordeal rituals in the wave of modern primitivism sweeping the country, with its attendant practices of piercing, tattooing, and other temporary and permanent body modification. The fact that teens flock to it in droves speaks not only of the enduring problem of peer pressure, but of the driving need for rites of passage that feel real, that feel as if one has actually survived something worth doing..."

He's right about that "wave of modern primitivism sweeping the country". Except it's worldwide in Western countries, now. And they are always seeking something more "edgy", something more dangerous. Thus, the current interest in the scene in flesh / hook suspension. Interestingly people are now looking for links between modern suspension and traditional rituals like the Lakota Sun Dance, the Thaipusam Festival, Catholic flagellatory orders, etc. When interviewed about this, Allen Falkner (one of the best known and most influential suspension artist - he runs suspension.org) replied:

"modern suspension has very little to do with traditional ritual suspension. Modern suspension initially rose primarily from body modification or artistic expression. In the beginning, any ties we had to historical suspension were indirect through people like Fakir Musafar who was directly influenced by the Mandan Indians. These days people do look for ties to other culture’s suspension history, but it’s generally more about determining how and why we suspend"

If suspension is something you'd like to explore, you'll find lots of practitioners and presenters via the References and Online Resources List at the end of this post. Because people, this is one of those topics you absolutely do not fuck around with, without a real time teacher who really knows their stuff. Bella447, our teacher, is extremely well qualified. She was not only a professional piercer, she also runs the Hooked Up events in Melbourne. She was to be assisted by her boy Paulus, and alexpierce, another professional piercer and partner to Satet, in who's dungeon the workshop was taking place.

The first thing Bella447 made clear in her Hook Energy Workshop was that flesh / hook suspension was not on today's agenda. We were there for something equally powerful. We were going to encounter hooks in flesh, definitely ... but we were going to learn about, and partake in, the ritual of pulling, not suspension.

Pulling is a form of flesh hook play where the participant(s) use their own strength and weight to put pressure on the hooks. suspension.org says:

"The experience of pulling is slightly different in that the body's entire weight is not supported by hooks in skin. The sensation of the skin being stretched and pulled to its maximum may be similar and the sensation of endurance and surrender may be similar but they are definitely not the same. In addition, unlike a suspension where the person reaches a state of complete surrender, the puller is in complete control of their physical position and level of pain"

Bella447 writes on Fetlife's Hooked Up #6 event page:

"A Pull involves having one or two hooks placed in the chest or back, that are then used - via cord - to "pull" against another person or an inanimate object such as a pole".

One of the best online definitions I've found of a Hook Pull is Londonfaerie's:

"The Hook-Pull is a beautiful, exhilarating experience inspired by traditional rites and ceremonies held around the world. Participants receive piercings in their chest and/or back ... Each person works individually to begin with, testing and expanding their body's limits as they pull on their hooks. Then gradually people connect and groups form, allowing this powerful energy to grow as it is shared."

As Bella447 notes on Fetlife's Hooked Up #6 event page, "The largest Pull setup we had involved about 50 people all pulling off each other :) Now that generated a lot of energy!"

So when did this type of play first appear in the BDSM world?

"Hook/energy pulls were introduced in the United States in 1987 through the work and exploration of Fakir Musafar. Fakir is credited with organizing the first ball dance and energy pulls in our Western Culture in community group rituals beginning in 1998. These types of events then migrated via the body modification and BDSM communities..."

I know for some readers this post is probably difficult to read. You may be asking yourself why on earth would anyone do either hook suspension or a hook / energy pull? They are different things but to respond to the first, here's suspension.org again:

"There are many different reasons to suspend, from pure adrenaline or endorphin rush, to conquering ones fears, to trying to reach a new level spiritual consciousness and everything in between.

"In general, people suspend to attain some sort of "experience". Some people are seeking the opportunity to discover a deeper sense of themselves and to challenge pre-determined belief systems which may not be true. Some are seeking a right of passage or a spiritual encounter to let go of the fear of not being whole or complete inside their body. Others are looking for control over their body, or seek to prove to themselves that they are more than their bodies, or are not their bodies at all. Others simply seek to explore the unknown"

As to hook / energy pulls, Mistress Matisse (who attended one of Fakir's rituals) found:

"The "why" of an energy pull is harder to express briefly. You can say it's a pathway to higher consciousness, because it induces an ecstatic trance state. For me, it was also a question of pushing past self-imposed limits. I don't like hearing, "You couldn't do that," particularly when the voice is coming from inside my own head.

"I'm not a heavy masochist, and I'm not terribly spiritual. So I knew this was going to be--pardon the expression--a stretch for me. But two years ago Max and I first saw one of Fakir's piercing rituals, and the pierced dancers were clearly on a trip of such joy and power that tears ran down our faces just watching it. Right then I turned to Max and said, "We have to do this."

It was now nearly time for us to do it as well. We'd explored suspending sol with rope with AugustusSeizeHer and MzGawjusRedhead a few years back. We were not quite up to flesh suspensions .... yet ... but hook / energy pulls? Absolutely.

Bella447 made her preparations carefully:


You can see the hooks, and also behind them two piercing blades / needles ready for use. Bella explained how these were used together. Here's some relevant info from suspension.org's FAQ page:

"Hooks can be sharpened to a point and forced through the skin, although this is unnecessarily painful and traumatic. The most common and practical means of insertion is to first make the hole with a standard piercing needle and follow that through with the hook. Needle and hook are usually in the same size, but that is entirely optional..."

Bella447 then showed alexpierce how to insert the hook and piercing blade combination in the experienced back of her boy:

Pulling is typically done with between one, two, or four hooks per person. Bella447 explained the reasons why she prefers using two. Suspension.org notes:

"if someone is pulling with hooks in their back, the placement would resemble that of a suicide suspension. The hooks must be placed in a direction so that the hook will not come out during the pulling. Normally this is done with either a locking hook, or with hook placed horizontally, or with hook pierced in an upward direction (ie. the point end of the hook comes out the top hole; the hook is inserted from bottom to top)"

After this, attendees were welcome to have hooks placed, or learn to place them in their partners. Sol received his after about half a dozen others. We left him until towards the end because he'd been feeling a bit woozy watching the hooks be placed, and we were not sure for a while whether he'd be fine. Suspension.org responds in regards to "How do I know if I'm ready to try this?":

"Unfortunately, this is the most difficult question to answer. Only you know if you are ready. Suspension readiness is much more of mental state than physical. As with any form of body modification, one must make the decision based on personal experience and research. At the same time, no amount of research or even watching suspensions in person can really prepare you for the feeling of suspension (but it sure helps).

"Take a long hard look at the experiences of others -- especially the "failures" and negative experiences. Ask yourself why it is worth it to you to face these outcomes and whether or not simply trying would satisfy you. If you can seriously say that it is worth it to simply try then wait and think about it more. A good test of whether anything in life is something you really want and are ready for is if you can stand to wait to have it. Infatuation fades but a serious commitment will withstand the wait and only strengthen your resolve.

"Ultimately, "you'll know when it's the right time," but don't be surprised if you still find yourself overwhelmed with fear. This fear will disappear if you accept it and let it pass through you -- resist it and your suspension will not be a pleasant one as you will not be open to the experience beyond your resistance"

Pulling is perhaps not as scary as suspension, but you still go through having those hooks placed.

However having watched the attendees' positive responses, and not watched the actual hooks being placed, and having given his blood sugar a sugar fix with Coke and a biscuit, sol felt ready to try. First his back was Betadine-ed, and then Bella drew on the dots required for his hooks:


As alexpierce holds sol's skin, Bella readies the blade / hook combination:


A fraction of a second later, it's through the skin:


And the hook positioned:


Here it is:


Sol later said that when the hook went in:

"it hurts like hell ... it hurts exactly the way you'd expect a 3mm needle going through your back would hurt. But they make sure you take a big breath and do it on the exhale, which helps ... you can't keep the pain in, it's difficult to describe but when you exhale you release the pain"

Time for the second one: second hook ... want to stop?

"no ... it's only pain"

And the moment sol said this I flashed back to a comment by Alastair Craig in regard to Stellarc's suspensions:

"Surprisingly - or perhaps not at all - he used no medicinal or meditative techniques to numb the pain. “I wanted to do it alert, aware of the consequences. Pain is just a warning system.” He remains remarkably undamaged from all this. The barbs, he says, were just “puncture marks” .."

"Just puncture marks"? "Only pain"? Hmmm ... I reckon Stelarc is more of a masochist than he admits *grin*. With both alexpierce and Bella holding sol's skin flap, the blade and hook are positioned for the second hook:


And it's through:


All done, in seconds:


After the second hook sol felt "totally flooded with endorphins, kind of dreamy and in space", a space that Mistress Matisse would recognize from her own hook placings:

"I had that slightly detached-from-reality feeling that one gets after being slammed with a big hit of intense sensation".

It's amazing to think how strong the skin is ... you only need two more of these hooks to suspend. Have a look at this photo of slavetrev1's suspension, which you can also read about on Fet here.

While sol was having his hooks placed, other attendees were discovering the delights of pulling. The pulling experience is different to suspension in that:

"The experience of pulling is slightly different in that the body's entire weight is not supported by hooks in skin. The sensation of the skin being stretched and pulled to its maximum may be similar and the sensation of endurance and surrender may be similar but they are definitely not the same. In addition, unlike a suspension where the person reaches a state of complete surrender, the puller is in complete control of their physical position and level of pain"

I wanted to share two different pulls with you, that sol and I saw that afternoon and evening. First was a three way pull between alexpierce, Satet and their lovely sub carlamichelle, but I don't have permission to show those photos. Here's a bit of info about what the photos would have revealed:

"In circular (star) pulling, five, six, or more people pulling at once is certainly possible. Usually, a large group of people perform a pulling by having each member of the pull connected to one central point or ring. With great attention paid to the dynamics of the rigging, it would be advised to form a circle with a central steel circular frame. This is the center point where all the ropes would originate from leading out to everyone in the circle (the ropes form a star). This position allows for any number of people to participate.."

In this case there were only three participants, but it was still extremely powerful to watch, as the ropes tightened and everyone's expressions turned inward ... although their interaction was very clear via those taut ropes and the stretched skin on their backs.

The second pull I want to share was a solo pull that occurred later that evening at the play party. Remember that suspension.org quote earlier re suspension vs pulling, that "unlike a suspension where the person reaches a state of complete surrender, the puller is in complete control of their physical position and level of pain"? I understood the truth of this after watching alexpierce pull while attached to the wall of the dungeon.

We watched as he closed his eyes and slowly centered himself:


As time passed and he became more comfortable with his position, he moved his feet back towards the wall, so that eventually his body was on a steep slant:


Watching Alex made me recall suspension.org's comments regarding the experience of suspension:

"The act of suspension is not about pain, but more the rush that comes the body processing the sensations. When you hang, both adrenaline and endorphins are produced causing the body to enter a euphoric state not unlike being high"

Towards the end of the scene Satet joined him ... although I took the photo I don't have public reproduction rights for that one so you'll need to go to Fet to see the last amazing photo here. Everyone who saw this scene was highly affected by it.

How does it feel? Alex later wrote on Fet "Such an awesome experience. Looking forward to more. ... an amazing headspace, I was bouncing around for hours" while Mistress Marry wrote of her pulling experiences:

"Those experiences are carved in My psyche as positive, pushing the limits, energy immersion, spiritual and intense.

"For Me, this particular hook pull was a catalyst for some badly needed introspection into why I was in some destructive relationships and that ending those relationships was what I needed to do. My feet never left the ground but I held My own weight and got back in touch with My warrior woman. She's been missing in action lately and I am on a quest to find her again.

"Even though there was a room full of people, I was alone with My own energy, My own quest and My own spiritual place. My friends held onto the rope and Me but let Me control how much I pulled, for how long, how much weight I put on the hooks and stretched My skin and when I ready to be done. When I was done, I was a tender noodle emotionally and needed more after care than I've ever needed before. I was a puddle for quite a few days"

Bella then began the process of removing everyone's hooks. Sol's wounds looked quite red at the time we removed them, and we wondered if he may have been allergic to something used on the day. But a day later a photo confirms everything was healing nicely:


I remember Mistress Marry blogging that after her own experience: "We were very different people on the way home" and it did feel like that. We brought sol's hooks home in the pink ziplock bag they were zipped into the moment they were removed from him:


Like Mistress Marry "Each time I look at My beautiful 12 gauge hooks, I relive the experience". We certainly do the same.

We look forward to further explorations...


REFERENCES AND ONLINE RESOURCES:

PRESENTERS / SUSPENSION GROUPS:
If you are in Australia and would like to invite Bella to present on this topic, please contact her through her Fetlife profile.

You can find info on Bella's "Hooked up" events here.

In the US I'd recommend attending Fakir's Spirit + Flesh Ecstatic Shamanism Workshop Rituals, which will also be at Thunder In The Mountains this year:

Fakir and Cleo Dubois are honored to bring the Spirit+Flesh workshop and energy hook pull ritual to Thunder 2011. Based on time-proven body rites of Hindu, Sufi and Native American culture this four hour event will offer a unique opportunity to focus and expand your consciousness for personal insights, transformation and healing. Circle casting, energy sensing exercises and flogging will help you get into ritual space and prepare you for hook piercing and the energy pull that follows -- solo, partnered or in a group with live drumming to propel your experience. Fakir, Elwood, Ms Cynthia, Minax and Yossie will be your piercers. Take this workshop/ritual and fly in shared ecstatic space. For more information on similar Spirit+Flesh events go to:

Look for other groups and presenters on Suspension.org's Groups page and Events page. Fetlife's Hook Suspension and Pulling group is also great for event listings / groups.

CONTEMPORARY RESOURCES:
Allen Falkner - Interviews
BME - Suspensions
BME - Pulling
Fakir's website - About Fakir
slavetrev1 - Realizing my BDSM dream
Suspension.org - FAQ
Wiki - Body Piercing
Wiki - Suspension Bondage
Raven Kaldera - The Ordeal Path
Mistress Marry - Vancouver Spirit and Flesh Hook Pull
Mistress Marry - Update: Random Thoughts on Hook
Mistress Matisse - Hooked: The Report 1
Mistress Matisee - Hooked: The Report 2

HISTORICAL / ART REFERENCES:
Mikkel Aaland - A Guest at an Oglala Sun Dance
Alastair Craig Stelarc suspension tech ai
D M Dooling - On the Lakota Sundance
Extended Body - Interview with Stelarc
Mark Fernandez - The Body Without Memory: An Interview with Stelarc
NeMe: Suspended Bodies - Uncertain, Anxious and Obsolete by Stelarc
Wiki - Stelarc
Wiki - Sun Dance
Wiki - Thaipusam

VIDEOS:
BME - Ritual Suspensions
You'll find lots if you type "flesh suspension" into YouTube

FORUMS:
Hook Life

Fetlife groups:

• Hook Suspension and Pulling
• Flesh Hooks
  

Various forum threads:

• hook suspension and energy pulls
  
• energy pull
  
• Winter Hook Pull Ritual
  

Thank you:

Satet and alexpierce
for their amazing hospitality, unreal food and
a magical weekend

Bella447 and Paulus
for their knowledge and friendship :)

Photos:

Ms160
(permission acquired from everyone in workshop photos)

Wicapaĥlokapi (pierced) Sun Dancers 1977
Image credit: The Lodge of Šung'manitu-Išna

STELARC
No title (no. 7 sitting swaying event for rock suspension):
from photo documentation of "Suspension Events". (1976)
Photography, Photograph, gelatin silver photograph on cardboard
printed image 41.0 h x 60.7 w cm
sheet 50.8 h x 70.6 w cm
Purchased 1981
Accession No: NGA 81.300
Courtesy the artist, Stelarc and Sherman Galleries, Sydney

STELARC
Prepared Tree Suspension: Event for Obsolete
Body, No.6 (1982). Foothills of Black Mountain, Canberra.
Photograph taken by Norman Ainsworth. Available at:
http://www.stelarc.va.com.au/

OxBall's Cock sling

A couple of weeks back my friend MissLis posted in Fet's ClubFEM - NSW group seeking more information and "hands on" advice about ball stretchers. As part of that post MissLis mentioned she'd been looking around S(A)X's website, and wondered:

"Does anyone have any comment on rubber, vs leather ball stretching devices, or any experience with these silicone ball stretchers, and a preference for either?"

I wrote back saying I didn't have much experience with rubber ones but that "we are going to S(A)X this Thursday and we'll have a look at some".

We did just that. We also asked Steve Sax his advice. He gave us two examples that he liked: the Trough and the Cock sling, both made by OxBalls. Edward Lee wrote about the company in a one on one interview with Ox, it's creative director / owner in September 2010:

"New product is highly anticipated and sells out within days, if not hours. Is it the latest Droid, iPhone, Mac notebook, the latest Xbox game? With names like Anallock, Pisser and Cock Sling we don’t think so.

"OxBalls is the leader in adult toys and enhancers for men. The cutting edge designs from OxBalls have turned the adult toy market on its ear. Never complacent, OxBalls is always coming up with something new and totally original"

I have to agree. OxBalls sells really interesting stuff, and you can also get some of their toys online at S(A)X. Their products are brilliant looking ... and I mean that quite literally LOL. The first thing I noted was the colors of the products, and obviously this struck Edward Lee too. Here's Ox's great response to a question about colors:

"I love black …. leather is black, my soul is black, my sexuality is blacker than black … but I try to key my product to fetishes. Fluorescent orange dildos are for Carhartt wearing trucker-fuckers. The designs in piss yellow are for piss-pigs, red is a great color for dildos—looks so hot stretching open a pink tight hole. Police blue for cop-fuckers and uniform boys. I make cock and ball toys and pisshole stuffers in glow in the dark silicone, great for dark dungeons and deep dark holes. And yeah, I make a few realistic dildos in brown. Guess who they are for..."

*grin* When asked what might be produced in future, Ox replied:

"We have twisted nip-suckers in really cool shapes launching in a month, piss-hole stuffers, a lower price dildo line, a line of T-shirts, gags, hoods, a line of underwear and jocks. Name it, if you shove it up your ass, if it makes your cock hard, if you put it in any hole in your body, if it covers your junk, if you lube it up, OxBalls will make it, and make it better than anyone else."

First sol and I looked at The Trough. We found this description of the product had some great ideas we wanted to try:

"The bad boys at Oxballs have a NEW take on the classic teardrop-shape cockring. It squeezes the base of your meat keeping you HARD … and it keeps your balls firmly in their sack. Made of FLEX-TPR, the same amazing stuff that the Cocksling is made of. As you slide it on, the fit is loose and flexible, but then, as you stroke and get BONED, the Trough gently grabs your meat and potatoes.

"Unlike cockrings that wrap around all your junk and push everything forward, Trough makes your dick stand up SEPARATE from your sack …. so your balls can flop and swing around while you stroke. And when you are fuckin’, Trough lets you get in DEEP while your nuts hang low and out of the way. Ox at Oxballs sez he likes to use it on boys that like having their balls slapped around while gettin’ milked..."

We've not fucked with it yet, but we'll let you know how it goes. What we really did love straight away was the Cock sling, so this post in going to focus on that. Here's the image from S(A)X's product page:

The Cock sling is a cock ring and ball stretcher combined. According to S(A)X's product page:

"The Ox Balls Cock Sling has a special recess to allow the passage of fluids whilst still giving that extra support ... The cock sling is made from thermoplastic rubber, it is light weight, super stretchy and has an excellent tear strength

"WARNING: Do not use with Oil Based Lubes."

Sol really liked the device the moment he put it on:


It's amazingly stretchy.

At first we thought it was going to be a bit too big and loose to wear, but everything was fine. Other wearers have found the same thing - here's Robert Anthony:

"I opened the packet and the first thing that struck me was how big it looked in my hand, I was actually a little concerned that it was going to be too big to do anything ... my principal reason for buying the Oxballs Cocksling is that I've been trying to get a ballstretcher that will fit me for ages ... Turns out the Cocksling wasn't too big at all (phew!) and it was very comfortable to wear and made my cock pretty damn hard without the eventual discomfort you get from a narrow O-ring material type cockring..."

In sol's case the device was not tight enough to assist / enhance an erection, but it would have if he'd had a slightly larger dick. However he was more than happy with the sensations it created. He immediately agree with Mr S's site, which found:

Made from a highly specialized type of rubber, the Cock Sling is strong, flexible, yet still amazingly comfortable. We stretched these wide open & they bounced back every time - so add a little lube, pull them on and ride your boy - hard...

"Likely the most fun we've had wrapping a new toy around our dicks yet. The rubber is ultra-stretchy and hugs your cock perfectly. Add the slight tug on your nuts and you have a piece of gear you'll want to wear 24/7."

Perhaps not 24/7, though. Sweat does become an issue. Rubber doesn't breathe, so unlike leather ball stretchers sweat is not absorbed. We discovered the effects of this during our first "test", when I directed sol wear the device for 36 hours. At the end he had a few sweat bumps and small abrasions that required a tab of Savlon, but that didn't really effect our enthusiasm for the device.

For our second "test" I directed sol to wear the device overnight and then instructed him to masturbate, so we could see how the Cock sling felt "in action".

I must say I really like the way the Cock sling presents the balls:

Access is excellent, and even better from a BDSM play point of view, they can't escape your ministrations ... the design of the Cock sling stops the balls retreating into the body.

Here I am gently scratching beautifully exposed sol's balls with my finger nails as he strokes during "test 2":


Lube was required because the Cock sling grips the base of the cock and there's not as much skin to slide up and down, it's all down in the balls. I directed sol to add lube (but not oil based):


And put more effort into his strokes. He said later that when he was masturbating the Cock sling made him feel like a hand was gripping his balls. I know what he means by that, but there was one point where I was doing exactly what he described...

Again due to their great presentation, it's just soooo tempting to pull and stretch the balls with your hands, as I am doing to sol here ... that's my hand at the top, grasping his balls ... note the whitened skin of his lower belly caused by the stretch:


I just couldn't resist a few more finger nail scratches:


I finished with some open palm slaps, first with one hand:


And then both (how the hell do you expect me to provide a photo of that???? ... both hands were occupied!). While indulging in this bit of CBT with the device in place, I thought about the fact that one of the major concerns about CB bondage and impact play is that there is usually no "give" in the restraints, which increases the risk of bruising and more serious injuries. The extremely stretchy Cock sling alleviates this concern.

At this positive thought I decided to give sol permission to come:


Sol said later that his orgasm "felt a bit cut off" ... it "wasn't as powerful as expected but on the other had it was more sustained". As if the intensity plateaued. We agreed more "Cock sling / coming" research definitely needed to be undertaken ... and having read this comment by Brian ("It grabs hold of your cock & balls and won’t let go ... perfect for edging") we agreed some "Cock sling / edging" research was also required :)

Our final conclusions about the Cock sling:

• feels "right" when you put it on, and is really comfortable to wear
• looks terrific when on
• seems it may fit men who've had trouble getting other ball stretchers to fit
  
• great for rubber fetishists
• some people might react to the rubber (see this post: "recently bought an oxballs cock sling – a cock ring and ball stretcher in one. Its a lot of fun to wear, but I can’t seem to have it on for too long… kind of makes the back side of my balls sting and burn.")
• light weight
• amazingly stretchy (can increase to more than double its size) so is not only easy to get on, it alleviates concerns re CBT bondage / impact play restraints having no "give", thus upping the risk of bruising and more serious injuries
• presents the balls beautifully for CBT
  
• balls can't escape into the body
• the design's special recess to allow passage of fluids works well
  
• can't absorb sweat like leather, so if you want to wear it for longer periods keep an eye out for sweat build up / heat bumps etc
• do not use with oil based lubes

We are definitely OxBalls Cock sling fans, and recommend you consider adding it to your toy box ... have fun!

Thank you:
S(A)X for allowing us
to "test" this product

Photos:
S(A)X product page
Ms160