Ms160 attends some NZ parties...

I was lucky enough to be in New Zealand for a couple of parties ... although I've not yet forgiven Steve_C for scheduling his M*A*S*H at Tawse Manor party for the weekend after I left (photos here and here and here on Fet).

The first was a swingers party at Tawse Manor. Wiki says:

"Swinging or partner swapping (sometimes referred to as the swinging lifestyle or simply the lifestyle) is a non-monogamous behavior, in which partners in a committed relationship agree, as a couple, for both partners to engage in sexual activities with other people, sometimes referred to as recreational or social sex.

Swinging can take place in a number of contexts, ranging from a spontaneous sexual activity at an informal social gathering of friends to a swingers' club and can involve internet-based introduction services.

While swingers and kinksters tend to be quite different in terms of culture and philosophy, there is some overlapping between swinger and BDSM communities, and it's that overlapping area that interests Steve_C and Sirspuss. As the Tawse Manor website confirms:

"Your hosts have been a regular Host Couple at Club SE for some time. As Club SE is currently out of action, post the September 2010 Christchurch earthquake, we are now running swinger nights at Tawse Manor"

I believe they've held about half a dozen parties at their home since the earthquake, and they were expected a good number of guests this particular party, including several new guests. I had listened to Steve_C on the phone to one of these new guests earlier in the week. He had provided lots of information and been very reassuring and if I'd been thinking of attending my first swingers event he certainly would have made me feel comfortable.

So what's involved with this type of party? As Will Turner writes in "Throwing a Swinger Party for the First Time"

"Hosting a swinger party is actually not much more different from hosting any other kind of party except that a swinger’s party is more oriented toward sexual encounters. Whenever hosting any party the host’s main concern should be making their home a pleasant place for people to enjoy themselves and have fun. After all, the host is inviting guests into a part of their lives."

I learned a lot about what was involved from my hosts, and really enjoyed helping a little with some of the preparations. Party rules were pinned up in one or two places. The house was cleaned and tidied, as were outdoor areas like the spa:


I loved thoughtful details like placing towels for the spa on heated towel racks near the spa. Snacks and drinks were organized by puss and The Sick Muse.

The bathroom was spotless, drawers and cupboards filled with anything guests could need, from super sized to snug condoms, to different types of lube, new soap, toothbrushes and razors, hair ties, shampoos etc as well as short black robes that guests could change into upon arrival if they desired.

Spare guest rooms (those that didn't have a guest staying in them, like me) were stripped back to the bare minimum, with elegant black sheets and lots of condom and lubes provided in each room:


The same black sheets covered mattresses on the floor of other larger rooms, where vanilla porn was played on a large screen (I kept complaining to Steve_C that it was boring!).

A very clever idea was putting up gauze curtains over the doors of rooms open to party guests. This not only differentiates party spaces from private spaces (which are also given signage), it also gives a little privacy to those outside and those looking in:


And privacy is important. For example, if you wanted to put your name of their mailing list you wrote it on the pieces of paper you can see below...


And then placed the paper in the box, thus keeping everyone's personal details private.

And because privacy is so important you're not going to get any more details about what when on. Sorry! What I'll do is quote from Claire Halliday's article "Sex in the suburbs" ( The Age July 6 2003)

"Within half-an-hour, the lounge, dining room and even the kitchen empty as the crowd retire to the bedrooms...

"By 12.30pm the threesome are the evening's star attraction. They choose the back area, take a position in the centre of the mattresses and, in a curious meshing of human skin, proceed to have sex with a young couple they have partnered before.

"The co-ordination of five bodies, is, at times, a gorgeous, intensely choreographed ballet. With the addition of a crowd gathered all around them, the mood is sexually charged. The music suddenly seems louder, the air warmer, the smell of mingling pheromones almost overpowering. I sit on the step and watch. If they notice the dozen or more people doing similarly they don't seem to mind. Brad will tell me later though that, for him, at least, it's not about the others watching. I'd prefer they weren't there.

"Others though, clearly like the voyeuristic angle. A position on the mattress next to this five-some is suddenly the hottest ticket around. Couples on either side stop what they are doing to watch and slide up closer so that their own skin brushes against that of Melissa, Peter, Brad and their two friends.

"There is a moment when the mood becomes so overwhelmingly erotic that I forget I am surrounded by slightly sweaty people, some with hands on body parts, panting a slow rhythmic background to the display of sex only a couple of metres away..."

To be perfectly honest I didn't get to see much (although I heard quite a bit!) because I was working in my room, taking phone calls etc.

Also at one point I spent quite some time looking at really great pony play photos that Photo had taken recently and wanted to show me. These we both really enjoyed discussing - the images were terrific and I admired the female dominant in them very much. Usually when I look at pony play images my attention immediately goes to the pony, but in this case the "trainer" was especially wonderful to watch, so confident and calm, all amid a magical outdoor setting.

I mention this because those photos became important the next day.....

On Saturday it was back to all things kinky. Steve_C, The Sick Muse, Photo and myself drove out to the farm owned by Sagamore and AfricanEclipse. It was a beautiful place, and there was something about it that recalled for me the farming landscape around where sol and I live ... this wasn't a coincidence as Sagamore later told me he had owned a property near us in the Northern Rivers :)

I met so many new people at the party. I was trying to keep names and faces in order when suddenly Photo introduced me to the trainer I had seen in his pony play photos. What luck. And even better, the trainer and her pony turned out to be Xanthi and Rivendell, who I have long admired. I spent a brilliant half an hour or so going through Rivendell's scrapbook with them, which documented almost his entire history.

After this I asked if anyone would come for a walk with me around the farm, and Xanthi agreed. She also very kindly lent me some gumboots. We started our walk through this kind of landscape:

Then made our way down the hill, into paddocks with cows and goats:

Very very pregnant goats at that:

We made jokes when we passed through gates, about how you can always spot kinkster farmers by their use of carabiners:


And then as we walked through another grove of trees we made a discovery:


A tiny kid had just been born a day or so ago, and appeared to have been deserted by her mother. After a look for the missing mom - all the goats were back in the field on the far side of the farm - we gathered up the kid (she was shaking with cold and extremely loud in her complaints) and headed back to the house:


Turns out we did the right thing as Sagamore had not known the mother of the kid was pregnant, and she may well have died if her mother had not remembered to fetch and feed her. Happily, when Sagamore and AfricanExclipse introduced the little kid to the rest of their goats, the mother recognized the kid and allowed her to feed.

Meanwhile back at the house, Steve_C and TheSickMuse were enjoying second childhoods and chasing chickens:


Steve_C really had this mother chook pissed off ... check out the way she's looking at him *grin*:


The boys then moved on to bigger toys - their singletails:


Here Rivendell is enjoying some attending from Steve_C:


Play was also picking up in other corners of the house, including Obi who was rigging in the farm's shed. I've not yet asked permission to reproduce his photos so you'll need to wander over to Fetlife to see what he was up to. I'm certainly looking forward to seeing him work again when he presents at Southern Exposure.

Sadly we had to leave early as I was flying out at 6am the next morning (which required a 4am start) but it will be great to meet everyone again when sol and I return for Southern Exposure in April.

REFERENCES AND ONLINE RESOURCES ON SWINGING

Fetlife group - "Swingers is not a bad word"

Claire Halliday "Sex in the suburbs" ( The Age July 6 2003)

Will Turner writes in "Throwing a Swinger Party for the First Time"

List of Australian swingers parties

Swingers Sydney - includes a page on BDSM Swinging

Wiki Swinging

Thank you's to:

Steve_C and Sirspuss
for their generous hospitality

Sagamore and AfricanEclipse
for kindly letting me reproduce photos of their home

Xanthi
for permission to reproduce photos of herself and Rivendell
and especially for the gumboots!

Steve_C
for permission to reproduce photos of himself

Photos:
Ms160