Ms160 and friends go (vibrator) shopping

My friend Jo has discovered the joys of cyber sex and Second Life.

Last week while having coffee in the local gallery - after she confided several seriously hot sexual encounters, and admitted a desire for faster orgasms - I suggested: "you need a rabbit".

"I need a WHAT?", she responded, her dark eyes reflecting internal visions of soft white furry floppy eared wabbits lugging baskets of chocolate eggs (for any furry fans reading this, the delectable Easter Bunny suit on the left is available here).

"You know, a rabbit vibrator, the one that was on Sex In The City ... those jelly dildos ...". She blinked. Still no light at the end of the tunnel, except now the furry white rabbits behind her eyes had turned into wobbly jellies...

Okay. Education time. So I began to explain how the vibrator industry had been revived and revolutionized by rabbit style vibrators ... how they were designed with dual stimulation points ... how over a hundred models are now available ... how they just get better and better ... how they contain different functions that make those tiny rabbit's ears pulse or vibrate against your clit ... how the pearls in the shaft dance against other pink bits...

I was in the middle of saying "some women who have reviewed the latest models online say they come so violently their legs shake" when I realized Jo's eyes had glazed over and she'd gone a tad pale. "You ok?", says Ms160, all concerned. "Oh just fine ... go on, you were saying?". "Well, there's an enormous range, I'll give you a link to the Rabbit Lady's site". "Who?" She was obviously still a little distracted. "The owner of TheRabbitVibrator.com, it's a great site, you can see all the different models there".

By now Jo was fanning herself with a gallery catalogue. "You know", she leaned forward, "I think I might be a little ... er ... out of date with sex toys. Are there other ... things ... like this available?".

"Oh sure", said me, "I mean there's all the dual stimulation models like the rabbit of course, and then there's the clit vibrators, they're fun, and butterfly style models. Did you ever use Joni's Butterfly in the 1980s? No? Are you okay? And then there are g spot vibes, and anal vibrators, and various bullets and egg vibrator, and also triple stimulation ones ... seriously are you okay, you look a bit...".

"No no, I'm fine, it's just my only vibrator is sort of basic". "I'll send you a link to some blogs that have great rabbit product reviews - my favorite is one on Stiletto Diaries, the photos of the rabbit entering the author's pussy are extraordinarily erotic - oh and also a link to VibeReviews, I'm sure you'll find them all interesting". "I'm ... ah ... I'm sure I will. So how fast can I get ... I mean, where do I find these "rabbits"?".

"Oh, online, via any of the local or international adult toy sites like TheRabbitVibrator.com. Or from any of the local adult stores here, like Adam & Eve's Adult Store - they have quite a good range and a great box of samples, we could go have a play ... oh sorry, wrong word (as Jo almost dropped her coffee) I mean just check them out. You really need to have a feel of them, they don't suit everyone, you need to see which features you like, what kind of control, size, type of vibration etc."

By now Jo was looking slightly manic - she was still looking at me, but not seeing me, potential sexual futures flashing behind her eyes as if she'd pressed an internal fast forward button.

I thought for a moment, and considered the online sex Jo was currently enjoying so much. "Actually, the rabbit model I really think you should buy is the internet enabled model ... the great thing about that one is that it can be controlled by your partner, wherever they are in the world ... whoever they are ... you can even have an anonymous partner ... you basically sit back and let them pleasure you... ". At this point Jo's eyes went from glazed and dreamy to sharp hot white sparks, completely and utterly focused on me. I felt like a wallaby caught in approaching headlights, about to become roadkill.

"Sound like a good idea?" I said innocently. My friend tried to talk, but her mouth was obviously dry. "Have some water". I refilled her glass. "Tell you what, why don't we go visit Adam & Eve's Adult Store? And it's Gai's birthday next week. Let's take Gai, too".

But when the three of us met up a couple of days later and suggested this, Gai looked horrified. "I'm a LESBIAN!". "Yes we had noticed ... but what does that have to do with anything?" "Well, I'm not into the penetration thing, my fingers are quite adequate for my personal needs". "There are all sorts of new toys you might like to check out ... clit vibes, stuff like that...". Gai's interest increased. "How about we go the day before your birthday? And do the lunch thing". She brightened further.


So, yesterday we set off. Sol and I had visited Adam & Eve quite recently (when we'd bought a Vac-u-Lock dildo for reviewing Sax Leather's Deluxe Strapon Harness, and I'd also bought a "little" present for nzcuck). It's an enormous warehouse, rather than a shop, and easy to spot, being bright pink with a huge snake painted down the side. It made me smile, remembering Gemini's post about his first visit to an adult store (at the end of my BDSM For Beginners post on stocking a toy box) how he'd tried to sneak in subtly. That's not an option of Adam & Eve's. But then the place feels more like a supermarket than a "sex shop".

My friends were rather overwhelmed inside - where to start? - especially the fourth member of our party, Gai's guide dog, who was particularly fascinated by a just unpacked consignment of porcelain toadstool shaped bongs that greeted us on our arrival, and through which she delicately guided us.

With her help, I shepherded us through the enormous store, passed inflatable farm animals, hundreds of lingerie items, and God knows what else, to the vibrator section.

I knew from my last visit there was a round table there, with several glass display cases filled with sample products: one was filled with rabbits, the second with clit vibrators, the third with cock toys. As you can see from the photo below on the right, the selection was fairly large.

We were the only customers around. Once my friends were seated, a staff member kindly opened the first glass case. Jo dived in, as the staff member began to give her the sales pitch for several products.

I reached in, extracted a fairly new model of rabbit, turned it on to vibrate only and placed it in Gai's hands. "Here's the head", I said, as her fingers curled around the main body of the vibrator, and her eye brows rose as she explored it's shape. "In some models the head can rotate completely". The eyebrows rose further.

"The texture is strange". "Yes, its silicone ... great when lubricated". As her fingers moved down the shaft I explained "these are what they call pearls, in some models they are fixed, in others they move freely ... they are just on vibrate now, but they too can rotate, which is very pleasant around the outside of the pussy". I pressed a button - the rabbit nearly took off in her hands.

Moving further down, she encountered ..."this is why they call it the rabbit, its to stimulate the clit". Her fingertips gently explored the soft attachment at the side of the shaft, feeling between the soft, vibrating rabbit ears. She grinned, head bowed as she concentrated on the sensations.

I looked up to see how Jo was going. The table was covered with rabbits ... pink, purple, green ... vibrating ... wiggling ... rotating ... purring ... others clunking along on their last fraction of batteries. It was hilariously obscene.

A deep sigh came from under the table.

When I knelt down to check all was well I was greeted by the sight of Gai's dog, her paws wrapped protectively around her owner's feet, trying patiently to ignore the noisy, vibrating tabletop above her...

I resurfaced in time to hear the staff member ask "were you after a particular model?" So I described the internet enabled model but added "I don't think you have it, it wasn't on your website". "One moment" she said, and vanished.

A tentatively dipped her fingers into the display case full of rabbits. I began to pick up vibrators and hand them to her. "This one has a dolphin as the clit stim instead of the rabbit ... this one has a bird ... this one a seal ... this one a bear, now, here's a good one, this one has a beaver". She roared with laughter. "And this one, the cock head has a human face on it". "Gross!". More laughter.

The staff member returned with the Internet Enabled Rabbit Vibrator. I thanked her and handed it to Jo, who had gone all bright eyed again. As she tried to see what the vibrator could do through the plastic wrapping, I explained about the internet function to A. "Are you serious?" she asked. "Absolutely ... any of Jo's online partners can control it". Gai shook her head.

Jo showed me the price tag - damn, it was more than double the price we'd seen on the internet. When the staff member reminded us they had a 35% sale, Jo said unfortunately that wouldn't be enough, and showed her the piece of paper I'd given her with site links and product prices. "One moment", the staff member said again. And vanished again.

Gai put down the beaver. "I'd just like the clit stimulator on it's own". I'd asked the staff member to open the second case a few moments before, so now reached in and began extracted toys.

"Try this", I said, placing a tiny vibrating mouse into her hands. This amused her. She ran the pads of her fingertips over it's vibrating base, then placed my own fingertips there, and cocked an eyebrow at me. "Not bad". "No, I could have fun with that ... the controls are also easy to work out".

We were interrupted by Jo. "What the fuck is this??" She pulled from the display case something long, bright pink with fiendish prongs. A explored the prongs with great interest. "Looks like an alien mouth with teeth", I said. We all exploded into laughter.

And so it continued ... "try this ... try this ... oh no wait, try this ...".

A small crowd of staff and customers gathered at a polite distance. I took some photos and grinned when two of the men shot about a foot in the air, in panic at the camera's flash. The crowd dispersed.

Finally we handed Gai a small soft dolphin. "Oh I like this one", she exclaimed, "it has a finger stall, I can wear it on my finger". Jo and I examined the instructions while A explored the toy: "it's got about six functions ... try the vibrate 1, now 2, now try the pulse function, hmm that could be fun".

"I really like this", repeated Gai, sincerely intrigued. "Great" said Jo, "we just bought it for you for your birthday". "Oh no you can't", cried Gai, and meant it. Then knowing us both, she gave in with grace: "do they have one in purple?". Another sigh of infinite patience from under the table.

Our staff member came back with good news: "we can take 50% off the Internet Enabled Rabbit". "Done" said Jo. Sad to say goodbye, we packed all the toys away and left with our bag of goodies, Gai's dog elegantly negotiating our way passed hundreds of toadstool bongs and a newly unpacked crate of female Santa boots. Several staff waved goodbye. We seemed to have made quite an impact. As we drove away I waved back to all our new friends and said "I know a great place for lunch".

15 minutes later we sat munching, outside my favorite local haunt, the S & M Bakery. I described their sign to Gai: "it reads S & M Bakery and Coffee, Freshness, Quality Assured!". She snorted into her smoked salmon sandwich: "do you think the owners have any idea?". "Nope, they're Vietnamese, they bought the business from someone else ... quality and freshness are essential in S & M play", I said, very seriously. More laughter.

"What a wonderful day", said Gai. "We need a birthday photo", Jo reminded me. I stood up, backed up a few tables and took a photo of my laughing friends (and ever patient dog) beneath the S & M Bakery sign.

I paused and smiled, thinking of the conversation that had started all this ("you need a rabbit" ... "a WHAT?") then walked back to rejoin the circle of friendship.

(Photos: Ms160
EasterBunnyCostumes.com,
RabbitVibrator.com)

(Many thanks: Jo, Gai + her most beautiful and very patience dog)